The rural ghetto

Apparently this song is where it's at these days. It even has a dance that goes with it. They played in twice at the dance, the second time a senior got on stage and "performed" for everyone. It was entertaining. If you want to be the life of your next party, search for the instructional video on youtube. Oh, don't worry, they played some ooo eee, ooo eee, but it didn't have the same effect as 3 years ago in Myrtle.

More Teblow

JLM Scores - Week 5

Running away with it fellas...

Matt 135
Woodson (MVP) 43
McFadden 25
Jackson-Garrison 7
Bennett 15
Burton 16
Smith 10
David 10
LSU 9

James 111
Cox 11
Jones 29
McFadden 25
Burton 16
Bailey 0
Wallace 12
Coutu 9
LSU 9

Larry 96
Stafford 13
Jones 29
Grant 6
Burton 16
Hall 14
Slaughter 0
Byrum 9
LSU 9

Gaytors....Gaytors....Gaytors won't you bite my ass

WAR DAMN EAGLE

It is 2:30 AM and I just watched Auburn make Urban Meyer and Tim Tebow look like a bunch a punks. I had to chaperone the Homecoming Dance so I didn't even start watching the game until about 1 AM. Holy Cow, I think I deserve to win JLM this week for having faith in B. Cox after I've bashed him all year. Good gosh I'm not going to be able to sleep for awhile. I guess I'll finish off the SoCo.

JLM Week 5

Team MontellJordansezThisIsHowWeDoIt

QB: Andre Woodson (may God have mercy on your soul if you pick Tebow)
RB: Darren McFadden
RB: Cassen Jackson-Garrison
WR: Earl Bennett
WR: Keenan Burton
WR: Rod Smith
K: Colt David
D: LSU

JLM Week 4 -- SHOOTOUT!!

In what was probably the highest scoring "close" JLM week ever (well, two of the competitors were close...excluding a certain math teacher who fell in love with a true freshman quarterback and two Bayou Bengals) the tie at the top was broken, and the new leader is........... Roswell's own me.

After refusing to ride the Tebow bandwagon for three weeks I finally gave in and picked the "Baby Rhino" against Ole piss. As I watched the game unfold I felt hoodwinked. Tebow is slow. He doesn't make people miss. Even though they run that dang QB draw 215 times per quarter I didn't think he was accumulating any stats. And his passes! Man is his throwing motion awkward. This guy has no chance of making it to the NFL. But something funny happened during the fourth quarter. They showed his stat line. He had 140+ rushing yards and over 200 passing, not to mention 2 rushing touchdowns and two passing. I started doing the math in my head. Holy crap, he was on course to put up over 50 JLM points! And I didn't even see it coming even though I was watching almost the entire game. Shows how much I know, right. Anyway I was going to pick Felix Jones instead of McFadden because D-Mac had a concussion against Bama and I thought he might not play. Good call by me. McFadden got 24 JLM points along with Dixon to give me 101 from my starting backfield. Harvin and Burton went for 18 each and Hall, Byrum, and Auburn combined to get me 17 (go figure, worst score was a bammer) for a 154 total. Could Larry catch up without Tebow?

Well, he started off well, picking up Erick Ainge off the scrap heap. Ainge torched the Arky St. Indians for 38 JLM points. Larry also got 24 from MSU's Dixon. Next up was Mario Fannin. After giving way to Ben Tate for most of the game Mario got in late and galloped 67 yards for his 3rd touchdown of the game with under 30 seconds left to collect a whopping 28 JLM points (probably the only time all year an AU player will account for 20+ JLM points). Burton and Lucas Taylor teamed up for another 40 and Larry was making up ground fast. Too bad he had the same idea with DJ Hall and Wes Byrum as me. With Tennessee's win he ended up with a total of 147 to come up 7 points short.

James was led by Taylors' 22 and Harvin's 18. He had a bold pick with Kodi Burns at QB (love the optimism) and got burned when Kodi gave way to Cox in the 2nd quarter. James ended up with 77 to limp home in 3rd this week.

So after four weeks, I lead with 2 wins, but I think Larry has the most overall points. It's starting to get interesting. Now we'll get to see if any of us have any sack and pick some Auburn players going into the Swamp. Gulp.

JLM Week 4

Team I'mtheMacandI'mbadgiveyousomethingthatyouneverhad

QB:Tebow, FU (I'm finally breaking down and picking him...now watch him ride the pine for the second half because it's a blowout)
RB: Tony Dixon, MSU (hell, if we couldn't stop him I sure hope Gardner-Webb can't)
RB: Darren McFadden, Ark
WR: Percy Harvin, FU
WR: Keenan Burton, KY
WR: DJ Hall, bammer (ouch, that hurts to do)
K: Wes Byrum (AU's MVP through three games)
D: AU, seriously why not...if we can't beat NM St. we can't win another game on the schedule

Couple notes...I would have picked either Tate or Fannin but I read today that Lester might be reinstated before the game Saturday and if he is he will play. Our RBs are a total crapshoot this week. Also, Early Doucet is out several weeks (or so I read) with a sprained ankle. Take the info for what its worth.

JLM Week 3...short version

I don't have the numbers with me right now (left them at home and I'm in the computer lab at school right now) but James got his first victory of '07 and we stand deadlocked with one win apiece after three weeks (kinda like Auburn...only not as bad offensively). James blew the field away with 130+ points, aided by his 11th hour change from Earl Bennett who would have scored 10 points to DJ Hall who was worth something ridiculous like 29 or 30. He also rode the Tebow Train to another 40+ points. That dude is a JLM hoss! I'm still not sold on his ability as a big time QB in a tight game if forced to pass the ball, but with all the athletes Urban Meyer has assembled on that offense Tebow might not ever find himself in a two minute drill. That LSU-UF game in Baton Rouge in a few weeks should be the game of the year in the country. I can't wait to see LSU's team speed on defense trying to keep up with the Harvins, James, Caldwells and Tebows of the gators. As for the worst team in the SEC...it's now a two team race between Auburn and Ole Miss. Oh my God, it's 1998 all over again. Hide the women and children, the Tigers are going to follow up 13, 9, and 11 win seasons with a 4-8 or 5-7 stinker. I'll try and find some time later on to tell you how I really feel.

Bear Grylls is a phony

You guys are man-crushing on a fake. Check out this video.

LMJ Week 3

Team SamesongdifferentverseIsuckatLMJ

QB: Tim Tebow, uf
RB: Darren McFadden, arky
RB: BenJarvis Green-Ellis, ole
WR: Riley Cooper, uf
WR: Earl Bennett, vandy
WR: Prechae Rodriguez, au
K: Wes Byrum, au
DEF: LSU

Thoughts on Season...short

One of my biggest pet peeves in college football (and Auburn in particular) is a coach's reluctance to play his young players because they aren't "ready" or don't "know" the offense/defense well enough. Under Tubs, we have rarely played any true freshmen (Caddy being the glaring exception and he was the number 2 or 3 ranked signee in the country that year). This has definitely come back to haunt us in recent years. In 2005 Kenny Irons led the SEC in rushing with over 1300 yards. And he did that only playing in 10 games. He sat out the Georgia Tech game to start the season because Tuberville and Borges said he didn't know the blitz pick ups well enough to face Tech's blitz happy defense (to make things even more maddening Kenny wasn't some green true freshman just out of high school...he played two seasons of SEC ball at South Carolina!!). So instead we played Tre Smith almost exclusively and had zero running game and, as I recall, Brandon spent a lot of time on his butt and threw four picks. So much for the experienced player theory. Now fast forward to this season. It's been obvious to the people who cover Auburn and who've attended practices the last two years that Mario Fannin is an absolute stud and the best RB on Auburn's roster. Now, every Auburn fan who watched Saturday night's game has seen the proof bust through the line and speed past defenders...Fannin is leaps and bounds better than Ben Tate. But who got all the carries in the season opener? Ben Tate. And what was the rationale? Mario didn't know the blocking schemes well enough. What happened to Brandon against K-St? He got sacked six times, knocked on his arse several more, and generally looked like a scared middle school Matt on a date with an actual girl (that was pretty scared if you didn't know me back then). And then they pull Fannin in the USF game just because he fumbled twice. Now their excuse is they were afraid if he fumbled again it would have an adverse affect on his psyche for the rest of the season. They were protecting him???? Are you kidding me? How many stud FB recruits out there lack in self confidence. I guaran-damn-tee you he was itching to get back in there and make a play. And really, when your season is potentially on the brink in the second game and it's the fourth quarter and your offense has been absolutely stagnant since the second quarter and you need someone, ANYONE to step up and make a big play wouldn't you want the single most TALENTED player on your offensive roster in the game??? Wouldn't you??!?!!! I sure as hell would (did). Now, let's divert our attention for a few minutes to a few other programs that have a little bit of national respect. First, let's take off our Pac-10 hating hats and look at USC. They are without a doubt the most successful football program in the country in the last five years and they deserve most of the accolades they've received. Pete Carroll has that team absolutel stocked with blue chip players year after year. And you know what his philosophy on freshmen getting playing time is??? It's this: the best players will get on the field. If you're good enough to play, you will play, regardless of your class or how many starts you've made. There's no way that Tuberville, Gran, or Borges could look any of us in the eye and tell us that Ben Tate had been practicing better than Mario Fannin in the lead up to the K-State game. No way. Now let's take a sneak peak at Florida. We all kind of made fun of the whole Tebow thing last year. There was so much talk and hype about them installing several new plays in the playbook just form him, but everyone knew that when he was in the game he was just going to take that direct snap and run the ball into the line. Well, you know what? It worked. He had over 300 rushing yards and something like 10 touchdowns. Had they used him properly in the AU game in the second quarter they would have beat us and gone undefeated. As it stands, I believe they won the national title and now he is looking like a All-American (granted their competition hasn't exactly been all that tough) in his second season. Over at Virginia Tech they came into the season with a solid defense, a fragile upperclassman at QB, and a stud true freshman waiting in the wings (any of this sound familiar?). In the second quarter of the second game they pulled their version of Brandon Cox and put in the stud freshman. Now, I realize that Auburn was actually leading at halftime of the USF game and that Virginia Tech was basically scrimmaging as LSU had already wrapped up the game by the end of the first quarter. Still, Va Tech's coaching staff made the decision that this kid gave their offense the best chance to score points and win. This week they named the freshman the starter. Now, I'm not saying Brandon needs to be dumped completely. He has certainly performed wonderfully in big games for us throughout his two and a half seasons. Hell, he's 20-6 as a starter. But you can't tell me that he's a confident leader of this offense right now. All I ask is that Auburn insert a few plays into the scheme to get Kodi Burns on the field this week and see what he can do. Maybe he comes in for two or three "Tebow draws" this week and then gets a series or two in the next game against New Mexico State. Maybe he turns out to be unprepared and really needs a redshirt year. But maybe he turns out to be poised beyond his years and inspires the rest of the offense to raise the level of their games. Maybe they start playing up to their capability and stop putting the defense in crappy situations and maybe we can win a few games against solid competition. Okay, this has started to unravel a bit and I need to work on an assignment for my education class. Here's my overarching point...Keep Fannin in the game and put a few plays in for Burns. If Chris Slaughter is the best WR on the team, get him out there and involved. Okay, happy Wednesday.

JLM Week 2

Down and Dirty...gotta screamin' kid and a wife that needs a break.

Scores:
Matt 99
Larry 96
James 87

You guys both wasted 50 from Tebow. I got 28 from Woodson, 25 from Dixon, and 28 from BenJarvus Green-EllisJingleheimerSchmidt. Larry would have won had he not taken Auburn. Ouch...live and learn.

JLM Results Weeks 1 and 2

JLM Week 1

Okay, so it wasn't quite as close as my last approximation but Larry still didn't get the runaway win he thought he did. He did however get the first W of the year in JLM Season 27. And really, as USF would gladly tell you, the W is all that matters (I might make some more game comments later or I might just save them up for another time -- suffice to say I am not real happy with the coaches right now). Larry started off JLM '07 with a high scoring victory, something we like to see. Of course, it's also time for everyone to load up on cupcakes...the scores will come down once the SEC slate gets going. Here we go.

Larry: The dynamic duo of Tebow and Earl Bennett teamed up to lead Team Huntsvegas with 42 and 40. 'Cock Boyd got Larry another 19 and Harvin paid off with 13. Larry was able to overcome his two zeroes (Lester Lester, the test molester and Christianson--that's what you get for drafting a Bama player) and ended up with 125.

Matt: Solid showing from Woodson (30) and McFadden (32) to go along with decent numbers from Tate, Doucet, Harvin, and Colt David (10, 13, 13, 9) got me to 118...close but no banana.

James: Flynn got you 22...but he was the lowest scoring QB. Jones was the second highest scoring RB with 25, but you had non one else score more than 13. You ended up with 96.

Week 2 was a little closer, but I have to run home now (I'm at Turner for the Braves gig). I'll post those scores a little later.

Saturday nights

Is it just me, or does it seem like there are more games at night, and the kick-off times are getting later and later. This doesn't bode well for it being a good "date night."

I hope we see a lot of this tonight.

NFL Knockout: Sudden Death

So, let's do one of those Sudden Death NFL Pools where you pick one winner each week, straight up, no spread. But once you pick a team you can't pick them again for the rest of the season. We can each put in five bucks to make it interesting or we can just use it as yet another source of trash talk. What say you? My pick for Week 1: St. Louis

JLM Week Dos

Team OkaythePreseasonisOver

QB: Andre Woodson, KY
RB: Tony Dixon, MSU
RB: BenJarvus Green-Ellis, UM
WR: Prechae Rodriguez, AU
WR: Dicky Lyons, Jr., KY
WR: Earl Bennett, VU
K: Joey Ijas, UF
D: AU

Thoughts on the game. The defense is going to come out smoking because they probably feel like they have to for us to have any chance to win. Last week I predicted to Cece as we were about to kick off to start the game that K-State was going to take that kickoff and drive down the field for a score. This week, I don't see that happening if USF gets the ball first. I think Muschamp is going to be more aggressive this week and will let Groves, Marks, Sims, and Blackmon loose. I really think Tray has a breakout game and does something big. Offensively I think we're still going to struggle. Brandon is going to look skittish to start off because we're going to go with short, quick throws, a few of which will get knocked down at the line. The running game is going to start slowly because you know USF is going to stack the box with 8 and 9 defenders, daring Brandon to throw. I think we'll catch a little bit of a rythym in the second quarter and go into the half up 13-3 or 13-6. Second half will be a bit more of the same. I think the third quarter will be heavy on defense and we'll score a little bit more in the 4th to put it away. Final score 27-10 AU. Mario Fannin gets his first career TD and gives us a little taste of what he'll be doing in this offense for the next few seasons.

Don't worry Brandon, I felt the same way

I know it was the first game, and Larry will probably provide some reason to be optimistic, but I don't see how Auburn wins 8 games this year. If I was B. Cox's mom, I would not allow him to play against LSU. They might kill him.

Football in the South

I thought this was a decent article on the impact of college football to southern culture. What's even more entertaining is to browse through the comments to the article. Especially, those from the West coast and Northeast. In my experience, the people in Wisconsin have an understanding of how crazy people get over football down South because they have a similar irrational approach to the Green Bay Packers. Still, there's just something different fans of a college team, especially if you went to school there. Also, there are people that love the Badgers and are passionate in their approach to being a fan. However, the impact to the city of Madison is not as evident. I realize to some extent, the fact that Madison is a big city has something to do with this, but on game day I can go places...including downtown and you would have no idea there is a football game occurring.

I haven't heard one word from national media regarding Auburn this season. I think history tells us this is probably a good thing. I'm just curious to see how Cox plays. I hated that feeling last season that every time he dropped back to pass, something bad was going to happen. I wonder if they'll pass more now that Lester is out. It would be great to see Tate or Fannin go for 100+ each.

AU 34 KSU 10